[m] when your eyes are open

[FADO WESSBERG]

As host and local party boy Fado attended the carnival, and quite willingly, too. This would be so much fun. They had a jousting competition, relaxing trail rides, delicious food, and so many different games and puzzles. And there was still beer, as always. He was smart and polite enough to not go straight to the bar or food. No, his main event today was jousting, one of his favorite sports of time. He knew he was good at a lance, and he loved a fair competition. Today was minimal damage lances only, but helmets and breastplates were still required in case of dirty players and accidents. Fado's horse of choice for the competition, Vince. He could show off if he wanted, right? This was his party. He didn't care. When he won a few rounds was when he would go to drinks and other normal carnival games. He would still be sober for the ball tonight, and he would take a bath before and dress in a nice suit.

Fado sighed as he thought of his pairing with his distant cousin, Eija. While his advisors claimed to pick the pairs randomly, Fado was still suspicious of their doing it on purpose simply to spite him. He didn't dislike or loathe the princess and great granddaughter of the great Restoration King, but he didn't find himself attracted to, or vying to spend time with her. He wanted this time to get to know a new woman, new people, expand his horizons. But no, he got to spend time with his pushy cousin who always challenged his position. And he really didn't want to deal with that or even slightly prove himself. He just wanted to have a good time. But perhaps that was impossible.

For now Fado started to put on his riding clothes, helmet, and chestplate. No matter what the ball might bring, the carnival was still for fun. He practically skipped out to find Vince already saddled and more than ready to go. He leaped on and looked at his opponent across the field. THis would be fun. He grabbed the minimal damage lance as it was handed to him.

[EIJA VIENO]

[atrb=cellspacing,4,true][atrb=cellpadding,5px,true][atrb=border,0,true][atrb=width,400,true][atrb=style, background-image: url(http://i.imgur.com/2AVyn.png); border-radius: 0px 0px 0px 30px; -moz-border-radius: 0px 0px 0px 30px; border: 5px solid #ced4d6;][STYLE=border: 3px solid #e4e9eb; background-image: url(http://i912.photobucket.com/albums/ac323/kaya_16/Other/mikumikuo3.png); width: 100px; height: 100px; border-radius: 0px 0px 0px 30px; -moz-border-radius: 0px 0px 0px 30px; margin-top: -25px; margin-right: -20px; float: right;] [/style] [STYLE=border: 3px solid #e4e9eb; background-image: url(http://i912.photobucket.com/albums/ac323/kaya_16/Other/miku4.png); width: 100px; height: 100px; border-radius: 0px 0px 0px 30px; -moz-border-radius: 0px 0px 0px 30px; margin-top: -25px; margin-right: 5px; float: right;] [/style] [STYLE=font-family: georgia;; font-size: 26px; text-shadow: 2px 2px 0px #dedede; letter-spacing: 1px; text-align: center; color: #333333;]— give in,[/style][STYLE=font-family: tahoma; font-variant: small-caps; font-size: 10px; text-shadow: 2px 2px 0px #dedede; color: #333333; text-align: center; border-left: 2px solid #232424; border-right: 2px solid #232424; border-radius: 30px; -moz-border-radius: 30px; width: 170px;]to temptation that keeps following you tonight obey the shadows cry[/style] [STYLE=margin-top: 5px; background-image: url(http://i.imgur.com/8GyR8.png); opacity: 0.6; color: #000000; padding: 8px; text-align: justify; font-size: 10px; border-radius: 0px 0px 0px 30px; -moz-border-radius: 0px 0px 0px 30px; font-family: trebuchet ms; border-left: 3px solid #ced4d6;] In the name of all that was good and great on this good earth, why the fuck was she here? Eija, in a desperate attempt to escape what the night would have in store for her, left the palace early-on. She would at least enjoy her alone time, alone. Or, at the very least, away from Fado. She sighed, wandering aimlessly about the festivities. Normally, Eija loved things like this. She loved the food, the life, and the many games set up. Special, exclusive to just this one night. The thought made her smile, feel like she was special too. Being able to be a host to activities that made people happy made her happy, because her people were happy. Deep down, she actually cared. People never really gave thought to it, because how many things she did that could potentially damage the reputation of the royal family; but Eija possessed such class, she rarely ever was condemned for her actions. But, tonight, the princess was shockingly tame. She gracefully ghosted around the festival, tasting all of the rare, delicious foods that only could be found on such nights. Especially the deserts. She thanked her lucky stars for having the grace of the Divine Light (yes, Aldith rubbed off on her a it) to have the ability to keep up with it all. Somehow, she just never gained weight. A grouped of giggling, bubbling Renais girls caught her attention, and Eija raised a devious brow. Mischievous, perverted thoughts came to her mind, although they were broken when she overheard where the group of friends were going. Which was a regretful thing, since there were three of them and Eija was having oh so pleasant thoughts. Jousting?

[/font] This wasn't such a terrible replacement.

Men who were in jousting were normally physically fit right? The night might yet be saved. After all, if she could be on someone else's arm that night, she could completely avoid having to spend it with Fado. She figured he would be looking for an excuse not to be around her regardless, why not save him the effort? She shrugged, at the very least she could easily seduce the group of girls. Unfortunately, the moment she took her seat and the event started, everything shifted.

A deep, primal rage bubbled up from deep inside the princess, she would recognize that frame anywhere. That hair, those eyes, they brought hate and jealousy straight to the surface. And she hated that, she loathed that she would feel this way so strongly. Her hands tightened into fists, there was no way she was going to leave just because Fado was here, not when there were so many prospects here for her to choose from.

Eija had two options: she could either refuse to watch and hope that he saw her rejection; or she could watch the other man who was going against Fado with excitement and chant for his victory. With a cruel smirk, Eija decided the latter. When the match started, she began to cheer with the crowd, picking up on the opponent's name since she already knew Fado's. She joined in the chanting with false enthusiasm, but it was very convincing. She went so far out of her way just with the smallest glimmer of hope that her actions might bring Fado grief....

It was almost sickening.
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[FADO WESSBERG]

Fado stood in his saddle for the roaring crowds, lance raised high in enthusiasm. Nothing could have ruined this moment for him. He knew his people saw him as a good leader, and also a good soldier. It was this kind of appreciation that let him feel good and that let him be more of a good sportsman. He looked across the way at his opponent, whose own people must have come to cheer him on. That alone earned the man some respect from Fado. He looked over those who cheered for the opposing man to try and find his ethnicity when he came across some bright blue hair that could always get under his skin. Eija.

[/color]

She was cheering for him! FOR HIM! The other guy! Just to spite him! Just to push it in his face again that he wasn't worthy of his title! He closed his helmet quickly before he let his face scowl and harden. That little brat! Always out to ruin any ounce of happiness I have! He gritted his teeth, and was almost snarling. He stared with narrowed eyes at the flag that held him back, held him back from letting out his anger. I AM WORTHY, DAMN IT!!!! He turned his gaze briefly to Eija. AND I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO PROVE IT TO YOU! The colored flag waved and he roughly spurred Vince into a gallop.

He posed the lance up high, higher than it should have been. In his blind rage he had it aimed right for his opponent's neck. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO PROVE MYSELF!!! his body screamed, and only then did he truly realize he was about to kill the man, and lowered it to the top of the chest plate. But he'd realized slightly too late. It pushed the man's throat and instantly his lance dropped, and clutched his throat. It wasn't cut, but a hit on the airway, even a slight one, was going to cause anyone to panic when it hit at say forty miles an hour? Fado, however, had also felt the impact of the other man's hit, though lower and more in his chest. While his airflow felt restrained, probably because of a dent in his chest plate, the King felt more guilty about what he'd just about done and what he still had done. He whirled Vince around and grabbed his victim's reins to help him to stop, pulling his own stallion, too.

Once he considered it just barely safe, he leaped off of the chestnut and dove between the railing to help the other man collect himself. He was horrified at himself, at how far he'd let Eija push him. "I'm so terribly sorry, are you okay?" If he realized his chest plate was bent in, he would know that the other guy had meant to play dirty, but that didn't change the fact that he himself just had, especially since with full armor that area would have been more protected.

The other man chuckled slightly, though it was ragged as his body opened up his trachea again. "I didn't think you had such a thing in you," he said, smiling. "You have gained my respect-Lord Fado." Fado's opponent coughed, but clapped the King on the shoulder. Now Fado turned his attention to the crowd, wondering whether they blamed him or respected him. He hadn't paid any attention before. "Considering what I did to your armor, I wouldn't be mad anyway." Now the King was confused. He looked down at his chest plate and saw the source of his short breath. Quickly, he fumbled to undo the clasps around him.
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[EIJA VIENO]

[atrb=cellspacing,4,true][atrb=cellpadding,5px,true][atrb=border,0,true][atrb=width,400,true][atrb=style, background-image: url(http://i.imgur.com/2AVyn.png); border-radius: 0px 0px 0px 30px; -moz-border-radius: 0px 0px 0px 30px; border: 5px solid #ced4d6;][STYLE=border: 3px solid #e4e9eb; background-image: url(http://i912.photobucket.com/albums/ac323/kaya_16/Other/mikumikuo3.png); width: 100px; height: 100px; border-radius: 0px 0px 0px 30px; -moz-border-radius: 0px 0px 0px 30px; margin-top: -25px; margin-right: -20px; float: right;] [/style] [STYLE=border: 3px solid #e4e9eb; background-image: url(http://i912.photobucket.com/albums/ac323/kaya_16/Other/miku4.png); width: 100px; height: 100px; border-radius: 0px 0px 0px 30px; -moz-border-radius: 0px 0px 0px 30px; margin-top: -25px; margin-right: 5px; float: right;] [/style] [STYLE=font-family: georgia;; font-size: 26px; text-shadow: 2px 2px 0px #dedede; letter-spacing: 1px; text-align: center; color: #333333;]— give in,[/style][STYLE=font-family: tahoma; font-variant: small-caps; font-size: 10px; text-shadow: 2px 2px 0px #dedede; color: #333333; text-align: center; border-left: 2px solid #232424; border-right: 2px solid #232424; border-radius: 30px; -moz-border-radius: 30px; width: 170px;]to temptation that keeps following you tonight obey the shadows cry[/style] [STYLE=margin-top: 5px; background-image: url(http://i.imgur.com/8GyR8.png); opacity: 0.6; color: #000000; padding: 8px; text-align: justify; font-size: 10px; border-radius: 0px 0px 0px 30px; -moz-border-radius: 0px 0px 0px 30px; font-family: trebuchet ms; border-left: 3px solid #ced4d6;] The instant Fado and the other man's attacks landed, the crowd drew a collective breath. Eija included. Except, while they held their breath, Eija crossed her arms and pouted. It was childish yes, but not for the reason most would suspect. She was not pouting because no one was fatally wounded, she was pouting because of what Fado did next. Helping the man stop his horse was one thing, apologizing for what he did when the other man was clearly not aiming to play by the rules was just...just...disgraceful! Never mind everything that Eija did, at least she apologized to no one. To apologize was to admit shame, to admit shame was to show weakness, to show weakness was not an option for a member of the royal family! She let out a low growl of frustration, feeling as though Fado was dragging her family's name through the dirt. Again, disregarding her own actions. At least she had a sense of pride, and didn't apologize to people who clearly did not deserve it. Fueled by her rage, assuming that this was only proof that Fado cared nothing for the reputation he gave to her family, she rose to her feet in one swift movement. Being a fighter herself, though a swordswoman and a fencer more than a lancer, Eija had the flexibility required to perform the stunt she was about to pull. She jumped from where her seat was in the stadium and landed on the sparring grounds. She landed neatly on her feet, bending her knees as she should. However, with only a fraction of a second where she wore an arrogant grin on her face, her gaze turned to Fado with a fierce glare. Resentment, hate, disbelief, all rolled into one storm. She was about to unleash hell upon this poor soul in front of crowd, and she felt no qualms about it. "And, just what do you think you're doing?"

[/b] She spat, crossing her arms angrily in clear displeasure, not that she though Fado gave a damn. "Please, please tell me you are not apologizing!"[/b] It wasn't a question, it sounded more like a demand she knew would not be met. Eija was vaguely paying attention to the crowd around them. She did not tear her eyes away from Fado, though she did note the handsomeness of the man who was Fado's opponent. She doubted a man like that would roll his eyes at her and attempt to sympathize with Fado, he seemed like a cheater and a partier, not a saint. And even if he did, which she would not stand for, he was no match for her sharp retorts and chilling logic. She knew how to make herself sound right, even when she might not be. Because to her,

she was always right.
[/b]
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[FADO WESSBERG]

Fado looked up with surprise at the boom of her voice so close, pausing with his chest plate half unclasped. But it was also that voice that made his eyes pull to slits and his jaw clamp. He had try really hard to make his eyes not so narrowed. He would not be viewed as so easily angered. "Indeed he was, ma'am," the stranger replied. Fado turned on him quickly. "You stay out of this," he threatened, but not so loud as for the audience to hear, but maybe they could guess by how he pointed at the man. The King turned back to his annoying distant cousin, and froze for a moment, lips parted.

All he could envision was his silly, distant cousin cross with him because he scolded her for getting into a fight. Arms firmly crossed, eyes narrowed, and blabbing off about how some of the young knights in training didn't know how to use a sling to begin with. He thought it was slightly funny at the time, but was concerned by how angry she was with him. Why was that? Because they were once friends.

Now, being much more familiar with stereotypes, Fado thought of himself as the 'trying to behave older brother that still got into trouble anyway with his more rebellious siblings', except he was that with his cousin and fellow young royalty, Roland of Jehanna. He didn't mind Eija at all back then, and not really her him either. They were just like brother and sister... That was, until the official heir was announced. But for that time... weren't they friends? Weren't they close? Didn't they get along? He was stuck in this kind of wandering for much more time than he realized.

[/font]

[EIJA VIENO]

[atrb=cellspacing,4,true][atrb=cellpadding,5px,true][atrb=border,0,true][atrb=width,400,true][atrb=style, background-image: url(http://i.imgur.com/2AVyn.png); border-radius: 0px 0px 0px 30px; -moz-border-radius: 0px 0px 0px 30px; border: 5px solid #ced4d6;][STYLE=border: 3px solid #e4e9eb; background-image: url(http://i912.photobucket.com/albums/ac323/kaya_16/Other/mikumikuo3.png); width: 100px; height: 100px; border-radius: 0px 0px 0px 30px; -moz-border-radius: 0px 0px 0px 30px; margin-top: -25px; margin-right: -20px; float: right;] [/style] [STYLE=border: 3px solid #e4e9eb; background-image: url(http://i912.photobucket.com/albums/ac323/kaya_16/Other/Mikuicon14.png); width: 100px; height: 100px; border-radius: 0px 0px 0px 30px; -moz-border-radius: 0px 0px 0px 30px; margin-top: -25px; margin-right: 5px; float: right;] [/style] [STYLE=font-family: georgia;; font-size: 26px; text-shadow: 2px 2px 0px #dedede; letter-spacing: 1px; text-align: center; color: #333333;]— give in,[/style][STYLE=font-family: tahoma; font-variant: small-caps; font-size: 10px; text-shadow: 2px 2px 0px #dedede; color: #333333; text-align: center; border-left: 2px solid #232424; border-right: 2px solid #232424; border-radius: 30px; -moz-border-radius: 30px; width: 170px;]to temptation that keeps following you tonight obey the shadows cry[/style] [STYLE=margin-top: 5px; background-image: url(http://i.imgur.com/8GyR8.png); opacity: 0.6; color: #000000; padding: 8px; text-align: justify; font-size: 10px; border-radius: 0px 0px 0px 30px; -moz-border-radius: 0px 0px 0px 30px; font-family: trebuchet ms; border-left: 3px solid #ced4d6;] Eija shot a glare at the man when he interrupted, understanding his confusion. Normally, Eija was much more of an introvert. She was much more calm and cold, condescending when she was angry but she rarely snapped. It was a very safe, and accurate, observation to make to say that her cousin Fado was the only thing that brought her to this end. He was. Anything else she could deal with fairly easily, with class and style. But Fado...being in the same room with him changed her. And not in the most positive of ways. But now, here, with her glare locked on his, something happened. His gaze grew distant, almost reluctant. Was that...guilt? Or just general confusion? She hated not being able to read the emotions storming his eyes, which only made her more seething mad. But, then she recognized it. Thought. He was lost in thought. And judging by the way he was looking at her, it was thoughts about their past. What they used to be, how they used to be. No, this couldn't be happening. She couldn't get dragged into what was so clearly a trap. And of course, who's fault was it but Fado's? Slowly, the daggers in her gaze disarmed themselves. She remembered how they used to be, all three of them. How could she forget? She could never forget how Roland just up and vanished, how Fado and the rest of her own family betrayed her. How everything just fell to pieces. She remembered them playing together, getting into trouble together. Whenever she got into fights, Fado was there for her. Sometimes, if she was cornered, he'd help her. And because of her bloodline, how much closer related to the Royal Twins of Renais she was, Fado faced the more severe punishment. But she also stopped it. Instead, now, she dished out more punishment than Fado had ever been served in his life the only way she could: verbal. She degraded him, insulted him, or worse: ignored him completely. Part of her knew why, knew that it was how she selfishly clung to all that she had left to cling to. She was nothing to her country now, just because she was female. And the only person she cared to vent that on, was Fado. Because it was all that she felt they had left. Anger and hate returned to her face, blame. It was his fault. He did nothing to defend her title, her rights, her very place in her own family! It was all gone because he didn't have the balls to speak up for her! The slap of flesh against flesh shocked even herself. She had slapped him, hard. Her hand left a red mark on his cheek. She made an almost inhuman growling sound, hoping he hadn't seen the drop in her defenses but knowing he did. She couldn't risk something like that again, he knew her too well. Fado, of all people, would know she was close to tears if she didn't pull herself together. Fuck him...and this whole God damned family!

[/i] But, there were some words even Eija had to be pushed to utter verbally, when there were witnesses. She knew to tone it down. "Damn you."[/b] She hissed, before turning on her heels and stomping off.

Eija didn't bother returning to her seat, the crowd was watching her too closely now. She'd never get those girls to have fun with her now, even though she desperately needed the distraction. She did, however, pause at the entrance gate. She wondered if Fado would mount his horse again, and slipped into the shadow. She hide behind the wall, peeking out from the corner. The gates were held open, she could see him without him seeing her. And a sense of dread washed over her in that moment: would this be their forever? Eija watching from a distance, never able to so much as call out his name? Though she'd never admit that, she feared it.

A great deal.
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[FADO WESSBERG]

Fado snapped out of his wondering only a little after Eija started hers. Her thoughts, her feelings, and he could tell that emotion was starting to get to her. Usually he would have doubted himself in this, but not now. He knew she was thinking of Roland's disappearance, the naming of the heir, when she found out she wouldn't be the ruler of Renais. Still, if Fado were to die without any children, the throne would be hers. No matter what he saw in her eyes, he didn't comprehend the flash of movement in his peripheral vision until his eyes were closed painfully, his head turned, and his cheek painfully stinging. He gasped, surprised, and turned back, prepared to withstand some other kind of beating. He wasn't willing to hurt Eija right now. Not when he still saw his little distant cousin. No matter what was between them now, she had still been a large part of any happiness in his life, despite how worse his punishments may have been or how many times she dragged him into trouble. She and Roland had been what lit up his world, and he wasn't prepared to hurt that in anyway at the moment. He'd rather look like the Princess's bitch than defend himself against her attack.

But that was unnecessary. His eyes caught hers again, and Eija was glaring once more. She made some sort of frustrated growl. Fado thought she looked tense and itching to hit him again. Instead she got closer, madder than a hornet, and hissed at him, "Damn you." The King was almost joyous that his punishment wasn't worse than that right now, but she was walking away again. Out of the arena, out of the area, out of his world, an outsider. He longed for his companions again. He needed at least one of them again. It was hard to live life alone like he was. Fado was too suspicious about others motives as friends. The King needed friends he knew he could trust, that never would use him at all. Yes, maybe he should just go ahead and admit it. He needed Eija. He just wanted her to be that light again, that joy.

Suddenly he realized the humiliation he stood in front of the crowd for. If there was ever a doubt before, there wasn't anymore that the whole country had rumors about the King and Princess's negative relationship. Attendants were now running up to him with a temporary replacement for his chestplate, but he pushed them off. WHY IS EIJA ALWAYS LIKE THAT NOW? WHY COULDN'T SHE JUST TAKE IT? Just understand? Just... Just accept things as they were and try to make the best of them? The truth was he missed her, but right now he was too angry at her stubborness. He threw off the broken chestplate and waved off all of his attendants in a sort of leave-me-be gesture. Angrily he dug into his pocket for a couple coins. "Here," he said roughly as he tossed the coins. "Have a couple of drinks on me and we'll call it a draw." His opponent, looking slightly shocked, only barely caught the coins and nodded dumbly. With that Fado began to walk away to the gates where Eija departed. "Oh, and make sure you use one of those to get you something for your throat," he called over his shoulder. He needed to get out of here. Now. Most unpleasant memories were beginning to enter his brain, lots of which were associated with the past.

He scratched his head once, trying to almost force it away. Again, again, again again again-again-again-again-again-again! He was almost thrown into a scratching frenzy, and maybe some would think he was trying really hard to mess up his hair. He didn't want to think about it, but they were forcing their way in. Reports of terrible noises from the Darkling Forest. Mom and Dad had never been gone this long to camp. Why hadn't they taken him with them this time? He didn't care that he was the newly named heir. He missed them. Weren't they coming back? Wouldn't they come back for him and his little brother? Why wouldn't Eija talk to him? It'd been a year since he was announced an heir. He needed someone with him. Search parties, search parties galore were sent out. They came back with nothing. Where were Mom and Dad? They wouldn't leave him and (brother's name here) alone. Never. Where were they? Weren't they coming back? Weren't they just camping? Months and months of searches and still no sign of them, only an empty campsite. Mom? Dad? Please come back! No, they were gone. The caretakers tried to tell Fado differently but he knew the truth. By the time he was 13 (announced at 10) he knew they were never coming back. They were most likely dead, and researchers had found multiple accounts of loud, malicious noises around the time they went camping.

He always said he'd accepted it long ago, but it still came back to haunt him; the possibility, what might have happened, and if one of them was alive and the other died alone. The worst was when he thought what if they...

No.

I won't put myself through that torture right now.

The thought had already crossed his mind, though. That in itself was enough to agonize his entire soul. Fado's hands crumpled down until they rested on his bent head. It was almost like he was half in fetal position where his forearms covered his face as he fought tears.

He didn't realize he was still only barely past the gates, but still hidden in shadow. No one approached. The attendants knew better. Instead they tended to the red stallion.

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[EIJA VIENO]

[atrb=cellspacing,4,true][atrb=cellpadding,5px,true][atrb=border,0,true][atrb=width,400,true][atrb=style, background-image: url(http://i.imgur.com/2AVyn.png); border-radius: 0px 0px 0px 30px; -moz-border-radius: 0px 0px 0px 30px; border: 5px solid #ced4d6;][STYLE=border: 3px solid #e4e9eb; background-image: url(http://i912.photobucket.com/albums/ac323/kaya_16/Other/mikumikuo3.png); width: 100px; height: 100px; border-radius: 0px 0px 0px 30px; -moz-border-radius: 0px 0px 0px 30px; margin-top: -25px; margin-right: -20px; float: right;] [/style] [STYLE=border: 3px solid #e4e9eb; background-image: url(http://i912.photobucket.com/albums/ac323/kaya_16/Other/123.png); width: 100px; height: 100px; border-radius: 0px 0px 0px 30px; -moz-border-radius: 0px 0px 0px 30px; margin-top: -25px; margin-right: 5px; float: right;] [/style] [STYLE=font-family: georgia;; font-size: 26px; text-shadow: 2px 2px 0px #dedede; letter-spacing: 1px; text-align: center; color: #333333;]— give in,[/style][STYLE=font-family: tahoma; font-variant: small-caps; font-size: 10px; text-shadow: 2px 2px 0px #dedede; color: #333333; text-align: center; border-left: 2px solid #232424; border-right: 2px solid #232424; border-radius: 30px; -moz-border-radius: 30px; width: 170px;]to temptation that keeps following you tonight obey the shadows cry[/style] [STYLE=margin-top: 5px; background-image: url(http://i.imgur.com/8GyR8.png); opacity: 0.6; color: #000000; padding: 8px; text-align: justify; font-size: 10px; border-radius: 0px 0px 0px 30px; -moz-border-radius: 0px 0px 0px 30px; font-family: trebuchet ms; border-left: 3px solid #ced4d6;] Eija was stunned by the display of frustration given by Fado. He, like herself, rarely ever lost his temper in public. She was normally the one driven to the brink of madness by his very presence. She felt a pang of guilt, wondering if she had pushed him that far, before shoving that thought away and quickly ducking behind the wall to hide in the shadow. She felt her breathing grow heavy and yet shallow at the same time, quicken. She was afraid of being caught now, caught red-handed doing something that would suggest that, deep down, she actually cared: staying. Staying, and hiding. They were both very obvious signs that she still cared somewhere within her hardened heart, and she didn't want that. Fado would never let her forget it if he found out, and though she feared losing him she didn't fear it enough to loosen her pride. She frowned at this, it wasn't how a person of royal blood would behave, or was supposed to behave. Her sister would surely have her head if she found out- No.

[/i] Eija shook her herself, she couldn't afford to think like that. A leader didn't live to please others. Still, living selfishly wasn't the way to go either.

Eija let out a soft sigh, more of a slight breath, and shook herself. She turned, about to go on looking for a distraction -- preferably in the form of another person -- before her gaze rested on Fado. Her eyes widened for a moment at his distress before she forced them to return to their normal size. She had never expected that she might push Fado into what looked like a mental breakdown. She couldn't have. That couldn't possibly be her fault. In all the years she's known Fado, Eija couldn't remember him ever responding to anything she did to such a degree of distress. Why weren't the attendants looking after him? He was their precious King for God's sake! Eija bit her lip stubbornly.

She debated between going to his side so soon after slapping him like that, and yet...it tugged at her heartstrings to see Fado in such a state. Because yes, she did have a heart. But because Eija was too much of a coward to act on it now, she merely followed him quietly, sticking to the shadows and making sure that he didn't notice her. She also made sure that few people would think she was following him out of concern, keeping her face twisted with rage so they might think she was only following him out of obligation. When she felt that it was safe enough, Eija stated making her way over to Fado, already feeling a tinge of regret for not approaching him sooner.

She reached out to touch his shoulder, but stopped. What right did she have to touch him? After what she triggered? "Fado?"[/b] She asked, by some miracle biting back her stutter. Her voice was laced thick with concern, but instantly she mentally slapped herself out of it. She needed to keep her facade up! Or otherwise raise suspicion! Eija hasn't addressed Fado with concern in a long time...she needed to recover quickly to avoid question. "What the hell do you think you're doing?"[/b] She snapped, though her eyes betrayed her. Her eyes showed a hint of her pain at seeing him this way, her reluctance to put on this act when he was so distressed.

Her self-loathing for doing it anyway.

"Are you fucking nuts?! You can't be seen in public like this! You represent the royal family of Renais, Fado! For God's sake, try acting like it!"[/b] She spat her words angrily as best as she could, and a passerby would believe she really was scolding him. But she knew. She knew that someone like Fado would hear the false anger in her tone, or at least she hoped he was of the mind to. She hoped he would understand, but she couldn't bear sticking around to find out. Now her mind was all jumbled up, and she couldn't think straight anymore. All she wanted to do was comfort him, but she was too damn stubborn to even manage that.

Maybe it was a good thing she had been stripped of her title.

Eija was clearly not fit to lead a country, if she couldn't even manage the inner turmoil she was going through on her own. She shook her head, trying to clear it but it was too late, she had a headache now. "Fucking moron."[/b] She muttered for good measure, turning on her heels to leave. That time, the spite had been truthful. And despite herself, she explained it. "If you feel like you're going to breakdown, then you should go to people."[/b] She muttered, just loud enough for Fado to hear her. Her hands clenched into fists, oh how she yearned to be one of those people now. Just like she had been all those years ago. "There are people around you who want to help, and part of that means listening. So instead of walking around like a damn idiot, go to them."[/b] There was a pause in her sentence, she nearly cracked.

Eija had to get out of there, the dam was close to breaking. She closed her eyes tightly for a moment before she took a deep, silent breath and prepared herself to walk away. With the first step, she felt like her body was being blocked by an invisible wall. She was hesitant to leave him like that, but she had a feeling he wouldn't want her around to begin with. Not after everything that had happened between them that night already. They were supposed to be dates for this stupid thing, and yet look at them: completely unable to be in the same area with each other without snapping. Granted, she did most of the snapping, if not all. Sometimes he just took it, and that made her angrier. Some part of her wanted him to hate her too, to return her feelings so that they had that in common at least. But thinking about it just drove her sanity off a bridge, so she shook herself. And prepared to return to the shadows.
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[FADO WESSBERG]

Fado flung his arms out to his sides before moving on, looking almost panicked. He needed to put as much distance as he could from those thoughts. That was the only thing on the King's mind as he moved through the crowds parting before him. Those thoughts, however, seemed to be chasing him down and following him closely. He couldn't help but feel the sense of abandonment, of worthlessness. Sure, he was King, but what did that matter? It was not soon after he was told he would be King that his parents decided to go camping; to go camping and never come back. What did titles, prestige, food, money, and luxury mean when he'd done nothing to get it? When these things also meant the absence of his parents?

After walking for about a mile or so, which still wasn't out of the festival, Fado stopped, leaned his weight against an empty barrel, and stared blankly. He strongly felt like he was going to be sick, but would only come up with dry heaves. That's when it sounded: the tone he least expected to hear from the person he least expected to hear it from. "Fado?" it said; the sound concerned and the idea shocking him. "What the hell do you think you're doing?" She'd tried to correct their slip of tone, but Fado knew that voice too well for that feint to get the better of him. Like in the ring, he once again thought about how they were friends once upon a time. Recognizing this, he wondered if she meant this and was trying to keep up her image, or simply felt stupid for feeling anything at all. He simply listened without looking like he was. He was still panting, still leaned over, still thinking he might barf, and now realizing he'd built up a fevered sweat. Finally she said something sincere, then muttered pointedly. As the words left her mouth, Fado started to straighten up.

How dare she!

The King felt so much emotion boiled up inside him now that he thought he might scream. He felt it rise higher as he heard the footstep that meant she was leaving. Without looking up he caught her arm. "Eija. I tried that a long time ago. She didn't listen," he said slowly, letting every ounce of anger, frustration, and grief lace his words and give them meaning. "Instead," he let go of her and let his arm drop, "she walked away. She's left me alone ever since." Fado shut his eyes tight and turned his head as far away from her do she couldn't see any of the skin on his face, just the backs of his ears.

Shaking his head, he marched onward. Fado wasn't eager to see any face she made or hear any word she said. It was clear to him that she didn't really care, or she wouldn't have turned away. Fado had no desire to watch her decide if she should be offended or not, nor did he want to know if she was remorseful. Despite the fact that he knew somewhere inside his head that she only disliked him so much because she had been denied this position, he only felt the same abandonment from her as he sometimes did from his parents.

Fado now searched around the carnival. He didn't care about staying sober for the ball anymore, he needed a drink desperately. As he finally scrounged up the closest concession stand in the festival, Fado curtly said to the free bartender, "The strongest shot you've got." Surprised and slightly taken aback, the man didn't hesitate to grab him a the small shot glass and left the bottle with the King. Fado wasted no time in opening the alcoholic drink and pouring the glass to the brim. He quickly drank it and slammed down his cup, wincing at the slight burn it left in his throat. However, he felt like this was just what he needed, and took another shot. I'm no stranger to alcohol, he told himself. It'll take a long time before I'm truly drunk. Deep down, Fado truly wished he would be drunk though. Maybe being hazy-headed would make these thoughts go away. He needed them to leave so badly.

After about five more shots, the King finally put his cup down without picking up the drink again. No, if anything, he felt like alcohol was making it worse right now. He wasn't drunk yet, he'd built up a good tolerance, but he was still considerably less able to make good judgements. He put the cap on the bottle and laid his head down on the table, arms folded as a cushion. What made this day go so wrong?

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[EIJA VIENO]

[atrb=cellspacing,4,true][atrb=cellpadding,5px,true][atrb=border,0,true][atrb=width,400,true][atrb=style, background-image: url(http://i.imgur.com/2AVyn.png); border-radius: 0px 0px 0px 30px; -moz-border-radius: 0px 0px 0px 30px; border: 5px solid #ced4d6;][STYLE=border: 3px solid #e4e9eb; background-image: url(http://i912.photobucket.com/albums/ac323/kaya_16/Other/mikumikuo3.png); width: 100px; height: 100px; border-radius: 0px 0px 0px 30px; -moz-border-radius: 0px 0px 0px 30px; margin-top: -25px; margin-right: -20px; float: right;] [/style] [STYLE=border: 3px solid #e4e9eb; background-image: url(http://i.imgur.com/HycNM.png); width: 100px; height: 100px; border-radius: 0px 0px 0px 30px; -moz-border-radius: 0px 0px 0px 30px; margin-top: -25px; margin-right: 5px; float: right;] [/style] [STYLE=font-family: georgia;; font-size: 26px; text-shadow: 2px 2px 0px #dedede; letter-spacing: 1px; text-align: center; color: #333333;]— give in,[/style][STYLE=font-family: tahoma; font-variant: small-caps; font-size: 10px; text-shadow: 2px 2px 0px #dedede; color: #333333; text-align: center; border-left: 2px solid #232424; border-right: 2px solid #232424; border-radius: 30px; -moz-border-radius: 30px; width: 170px;]to temptation that keeps following you tonight obey the shadows cry[/style] [STYLE=margin-top: 5px; background-image: url(http://i.imgur.com/8GyR8.png); opacity: 0.6; color: #000000; padding: 8px; text-align: justify; font-size: 10px; border-radius: 0px 0px 0px 30px; -moz-border-radius: 0px 0px 0px 30px; font-family: trebuchet ms; border-left: 3px solid #ced4d6;] Hearing it from him was a shock. Eija knew that she had abandoned Fado, but she didn't need to actually hear it from him. Fucking moron, I wasn't talking about myself.

[/i] She wished she could be talking about herself, but she knew better. She knew it was too little too late for that. Eija said nothing as she heard Fado storm off, she did nothing. What was there to say? Or do? Stop him? Whatever for, she wasn't upset at him. Tell him something? Oh yes, like how she knew that already. That was sure to go over well. He already seemed sick, she saw no need to make him kill himself.

She sighed, dreading the ball later on that night. At least she could escape him for a while longer. And to support the spirit of avoidance, she didn't follow him. Eija figured that, no matter what Fado chose to do with his sorrow, he'd be okay. He was a responsible person -- especially between the two of them. She groaned when she thought of her sister...there was no way she was going to escape an 'I told you so' from her kid sister that night. But maybe she'd be too distracted to give a speech, hanging out with Adam or something. But Eija's mind went from her sister and Adam, right back to Fado and guilt. She shook herself, trying to get a grip on her sanity. Maybe she'd be able to avoid him that night at the ball too.

Running seemed to be a talent of her's.

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